Writing and Spiraling with AI

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Gen X is my generation. The “Middle Child” Generation, which is often forgotten and always pissed off. As a ten-year-old, I explored on foot, carried my own house key, and stayed out past dark. When strangers spoke to me, I sassed them back. Gen X grew up with analog and digital, and I vividly remember when computers were beige.

Times change, and I’ve always been afraid of being out of the loop. Knowledge is power in my mind, and fear finally dug its claws into me. So, when AI became widely available, I had to stay relevant and master it. Over the past few years, I’ve tried multiple AI writing apps, and my productivity has plummeted to zip, zero, and crap. To be clear, I’m not a disgruntled writer bashing AI as a tool, but I cannot comprehend how self-publishers can utilize it to produce AI slop.

For almost a decade, I’ve created fiction outlines for indie publishers in addition to ghostwriting romance books. My specialty was dark romances with bad boy heroes and the clueless heroines who fell for them. I ghostwrote numerous books, but completing my own dark romance novel has been a challenge. I thought AI would be the solution to finishing my manuscripts. My intent was to use it to fix plot holes, call out saggy middles, and rewrite opening chapters into must-read content.

Well, I’ve been working on the same two outlines for the past two years. Multiple documents have been created, deleted, and started over again in an attempt to get the characters, the pacing, and the beats just right. I’ve watched hours of YouTube influencers explain how to use AI for better, easier, and quicker results. I’ve switched AI platforms in search of the next shiny thing that would meet my ambitious expectations. But my dark heroes remain troubled and unwritten.

Progress has dodged my best efforts, and I have nothing to show for my time investment. I spiraled into multiple directions of non-productive writing sessions. The outlines have grown from documents that should have been 20K words each to multiple chats that have cost infinite tokens. I was sucked in by the illusion of succeeding, though I suspect AI was training off my gullibility. Did I mention that Gen Xers are suspicious and sarcastic?

I directly stated my suspicions to AI in blunt terms, telling it that my work was in a downward spiral weighed down by our collective indecisiveness. AI responded by asking me questions to solve my problem. I finally noticed that AI asked a lot of questions under the guise of being helpful. Questions about how I felt about my indecision followed by a pep talk about making choices.

I challenged its low opinion of me, and it backtracked with an apology. I had to remind myself that I was not having a discussion with a human. Do you remember the folk legend of John Henry, who beat the steam engine to the finish line only to drop dead at the end? I remembered, in the middle of the night.

But like a moth with singed wings, I tried AI again. The beat template I wanted was finally moving forward. AI drafted a beat template for Act 1 after a week. The following week, I used index cards and a pencil to draft Act 2. It took a day and a half to complete.

Will I continue to attempt to use it for writing? Yes, because AI isn’t going out with the bathwater. It tends to perform best on clearly defined writing tasks, not long creative projects. It’s great for strongly worded emails to businesses that screw up accounts and bills. After all, it is a tool, and “to err is human, to forgive divine,” but we shall see.

I ended my last ghostwriting contract to avoid using AI extensively. Typos and grammar checking are acceptable to me, but creative writing is a troubling descent into the AI slop pile. My heroes might be morally gray, but my writing is not. 

My thoughts on writing with AI

Vintage typewriter with text

To err is human, to write is AI.

There’s a divisive split in the writing world on using AI. On one side, writers are concerned that AI will replace them. On the other hand, novices are convinced AI will magically write their bestseller in an hour. Both groups are wrong.

As a ghostwriter, I have used many AI writing apps such as Sudowrite, Novel AI, and Novelcrafter at my clients’ requests. The same clients want complex characters, original stories, and plot points that will hook readers. They also want to write eBooks quickly and efficiently. Well, AI is not a magic wand; it’s a tool. A frustrating, verbose mess of a tool. It reminds me of the fairy knots I get in my hair. Impossible tangles that I can’t ease out with my fingers, and in the end, I have to cut them out. My experience is the same with AI. I try to ease out the bad prose with my keyboard, but in the end, I end up cutting it out.  

When I use AI, I write a detailed outline first to aim for the rough draft I want. The outline has to be detailed in every aspect and nothing is left to chance. And it often has to be repeated because AI has a limited memory. It will cheerfully offer to help, and then a paragraph later make something up because it doesn’t remember what it was asked. It is confidently incorrect. It would be a fun mad-lib experiment to work with the random content if I didn’t have a deadline. 

Using AI is like drawing in a coloring book. I draw the outline, and AI colors it in. If I don’t prompt it, it will scribble all over my drawing in a big black Sharpie. It’s like writing a story with a quill and having an editor review it with crayon. 

Is it all bad? No. But it has limits. I ghostwrite romance that will hit the bestseller chart for a few weeks, never to return. My personal goal is to write my own novel that will have a longer shelf life than a month. Would I use AI for my personal projects? Yes. Grammarly is AI, editing in MS Word is AI, Google Docs is AI. So many people have used it for decades. The difference is in assisting with content and generating it.  

AI won’t write a good book. Not the way a writer would want it. It hallucinates, repeats, loses threads, and has no real understanding of characters’ emotional arcs. How can it describe feelings when it’s never had one? 

But I would encourage commercial writers to experiment with AI even if you don’t plan to publish the results. A concern I have is not knowing AI will lead to more problems for writers, not fewer. Not knowing how to utilize it will make a working writer less competitive than those that do. Clients still want a writer’s creativity, but they also want AI’s speed. AI is useful for grunt work that can take hours to research. I’ve used it to describe landscapes of places I’ve never been but my characters have.

If one knows how to prompt, steer, and revise AI, there are some positives when getting it done matters more than perfection. Besides, AI isn’t going away. Think of it as an overeager intern that you have to patiently explain what to do. Can I do it myself faster? Maybe, but with AI, I’ll never have writer’s block again. 

I have a Claude subscription and use it to do a lot of smaller tasks, especially write email. It helps build my confidence even if it’s only proofreading an email to building management for a pool pass. According to Claude, I am a genius at everything I do. It’s the stage mother I never had in life. It gives me a blue ribbon when I finish last, and in return, I’m teaching it sarcasm. 

Working in commercial fiction, I will continue to learn how to wrangle AI. I like fiddling around with tech, and it’s a new toy. But for my own work, I am setting up an old laptop that will never go online. On the plus side, AI has made me proud of my mistakes because every typo is proof that a human wrote it.

RIP Senator John McCain

Yes, he put Sarah Palin on the media platform, but McCain defended future President Obama against bigots. McCain didn’t take the low road and it may have cost him a crucial election. Instead, he taught the difference between having character and being a personality.

From The Seattle Times published October 11, 2008

“I have to tell you, he is a decent person and a person that you do not have to be scared of as president of the United States,” McCain said to boos and groans from supporters.

Livin’ la Vida Virgo

Livin' La Vida Virgo (1)

What if I had used my astrological chart like a user’s manual to guide my life? But being a Virgo disappoints me. The tagline should read, “The dullest sign on the planet excluding Capricorn.” What if I had lived my life like the anal retentive person I was born to be? What if I had embraced being organized, analytical, and practical? Or being logical, and always right? Or being helpful with sincerity instead of sarcasm? Could I have done it without dying of boredom?

I went to a Vedic astrologer for answers. He informed me that I was actually a Leo. He said I was born at the tail end of the sign. In other words, I am the back end of a cat.  Well, I’d rather be boring than a cat’s ass.

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